Thanks to those who respond. Gives me incentive to pursue this. When I get home to where I can navigate my computer better than this - here at Peter and Cindy’s I am in agony every time I approach this machine. - I will email everybody back. Each response brings so many memories.

Tonight was thinking of the men who have visited me at the house in the middle of the day! Not too many of them, but each with a message, so to speak

The first incident - Hobbs, New Mexico. Henry was a well site geologist and was over worked and underpaid! He put thousands of miles on his car every month, one month 10,000 miles, tending to wells throughout eastern New Mexico. In those days I was a “kept woman” at home, a la Donna Reed style, cleaning house in a swingy skirt, sweater set, pearls and high heels…you get the idea… actually I was in a sweat shirt and jeans. One day at lunch time one of Henry’s “friends” from the office appeared at the door. He was also a geologist, we knew him and his wife slightly, he was in town for a few days, and knew that Henry was far far away. This guy ( I remember his name well ) arrived, uninvited, for lunch and conversation, and curious about how happy I was in my present marriage! He presented himself as the man to solve any love life problems I may have, on any basis I would like to name. The only time I’ve ever been “propositioned.” Things got a little sticky there, as I was very naïve, and speechless! Finally I managed to make him understand that not only was chemistry with Henry wildly wonderful, it was so successful that I was at the time with child. He left, not necessarily embarrassed, but disappointed. I never told Henry – this Gentle Giant would have strangled him.

So – in Tripoli. The prelude: Henry again a well site geologist, and worked a better schedule than we ever had in the states. Here, he was on the well two weeks, and home a week, quite regularly. The second Christmas Eve we were there, the Big Boss of Drilling knocked on our door about 11 pm. He came in, like Santa Claus, and quite pleased with himself, as he had made a major decision and brought us a Christmas present – a promotion for Henry.

This man was a legend in his time, for two generations he was the Granddaddy of drilling throughout the Middle East– he had created many of the innovations for Aramco drilling in the late 40s and 50s. He announced that he had met hundreds of geologists, that all geologists are less than bright and basically get in the way on a rig. But now he had found a geologist of worth, that would be Henry, and his plan was to get Henry out of geology and into drilling where he could make a real contribution in the oil business. He knew Henry would be happy over this move. He really wanted to meet me, as he knew I had no idea what I would be in for – as a drilling wife. Henry was thrilled. I innocently thought, well, whatever. He was right. I had NO idea. Drilling foremen with Esso had no schedule. As long as the rig was drilling, the men stayed there, only to come into town when the rig was “skidded” to another location. Sometimes he was gone as long as six weeks at a time. Occasionally he was home after only a couple of weeks. He was never home more than three or four days consecutive days, sometimes a week. Occasionally, on an especially long assignment, they would fly him into town for a weekend. Henry loved it. At that time the drilling department was on the cusp of every new innovation in drilling – his crews made the fastest holes within or under budget with the newest programs – it was a glorious time for him. Thrilling. And, I learned to live alone with little kids, and wait.

“They also serve who only stand and wait.” Didn’t Winston Churchill say that?

Backing up, a few days after the announcement that Henry was transferred to drilling under Jim Noel, I had a visit at lunch time! Henry was on the rig, of course. It was big corporate news, this transfer. The man visiting did not work for Esso, but another major oil company. He and his family were good friends, I taught his kids piano. He was the Branch president of the LDS church in Tripoli – all 17 of us. His mission this day was basically twofold: 1. He volunteered he was somewhat envious of Henry, assuming this position. I remember his saying, “I would give anything to have a chance to work in Esso’s drilling program under that Old Grey Fox, Jim Noel.” 2. He was genuinely worried about me, as he knew how much I was going to be alone, from now on and forever! He quizzed me about how I felt about Henry’s job promotion. Could I manage to live and not complain or would I make it so miserable for Henry that he could not do his job? He sat at the kitchen table, we talked – rather, he talked - and gave me some good advice, and helped me come to realize that Henry and I were in this together, my part truly was to let him go at it with gusto – which he did - he LOVED that job in that situation, and I was to remember to always be glad for him. Actually, be glad for us.

I did pretty well. About a year later, two other men from the church came by, very concerned about a young wife who was not adjusting to life in North Africa, and asked me to take her under my wing. And… I just crumbled. I started to cry, “who is taking care of ME?” They were so startled, as they assumed I was just fine, I appeared to be.

I was, just didn’t realize it.

Later still: living in Dhahran. Henry’s job situation was now, Manager, Drilling and Workover, Saudi Aramco. One could really make that sound big. It was big, in some circles. I did have my times, especially when the second child went out to boarding school. After sobbing some, I pleaded with Henry to get a job in the states, any job – work in a hardware store. We had the Talk: “this is what I do. This is where I do it. Please accept this, or, there are planes flying out of Dhahran every day.” I chose, again, to stay. Later, came the knock on the door at lunch time. It was very good friend, down from Ras Tanura for the day. I said, come in!!!! I’ll fix you lunch. He said, No!!!! I can’t come into your house in the middle of the day without Henry here. I will stand here on your porch and just tell you this: I’ve been in personnel meetings all morning, we are investigating fraud and flagrant misuse of company funds, and as I left the office I’ve come to realize that Henry Cook of the Drilling Department is the only department in the entire company not under investigation. Bonnie, I just want you to know that this morning it looks as if Henry must be the last honest manager in Aramco!

This is a bit hyperbolic, especially to those married to other managers in Aramco, but, you get the idea here.

The last incident - was reversed. One day, during our final year in Arabia, I was walking Tara the dog through the neighborhood while Anne was having a piano lesson, and a driller came out of his door, flagged me down, and asked me to come into his house. I preferred to talk to him out on his lawn – his wife was out of the country right then, they were having some serious introspective issues. We stood in his yard, talking a long time. His question was, “How have YOU managed? How can you live like this, over here, for so long, with Henry always gone, always at work.? What’s in it for you?”

I was stunned. Finally could reply: how? It is a way of life. What makes it work? Henry loves what he does. That makes him happy. And, we love each other. I know that he loves me; completely. He is secure in my absolute love for him. And, he totally takes care of me.

I am the original “kept woman”. Everything is in it for me.